Mutton's short story thread

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Re: Mutton's turd story thread

Post by Guest » Sun Jul 05, 2020 7:30 pm

I took a poo. Then wiped my bottom.

The end.

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Great Britain ChrisMuttonshutter
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by ChrisMuttonshutter » Mon Jul 06, 2020 12:18 pm

Good try but it needs some work.....
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by ChrisMuttonshutter » Mon Jul 06, 2020 12:28 pm

He hadn't had a shit for six months so he approached the toilet with great trepidation. He really had to go this time.
He sat down and strained and pushed and he felt a small movement ......
....his arse split open, then wider and wider. It was like the dead sea opening. Out it all came together with all his intestines and guts.
He bled to death, never getting to wipe his arse for a last time.
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by ChrisMuttonshutter » Thu Jul 09, 2020 11:37 am

He bought her some flowers. The first for ages.
" They're lovely " she cooed "does this mean I'll have to open my legs tonight "
" No put them in a vase like every fucker else does " came the reply.


for all you romantics out there
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by ChrisMuttonshutter » Sat Jul 18, 2020 6:41 am

She gasped and grabbed the headboard.
"It wants to be a bit higher "
"Fucking hell I'm doing my best" he replied.
He plunged deeper.
"I'll get this curtain rail up if it kills me" he said as the drill bit broke......
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by ChrisMuttonshutter » Sat Sep 19, 2020 12:10 pm

The wind was whistling through the land.
He sat and thought.
He'd conquered the place and rid it of all the fucktards. No fucker could touch him.
Alas the land was now barren and slowly, very slowly lowlife were slinking in, polluting what couldn't be polluted.
He stepped out and surveyed what was his .....it held no challenges anymore .......the place now bored him ....

He'd made the decision ages ago but now was the time. He walked forward towards the abyss....
New challenges and lands awaited his presence .....
He stepped into the unknown ready to make his mark elsewhere and he was gone ......................
Tell them my story he thought .....

The End
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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by Guest » Sat Sep 19, 2020 9:51 pm

Piss off before you get a thick ear and a fat lip :yank:

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Re: Mutton's short story thread

Post by Guest » Sat Sep 19, 2020 10:57 pm

ChrisMuttonshutter wrote:
Sat Sep 19, 2020 12:10 pm
The wind was whistling through the land.
He sat and thought.
He'd conquered the place and rid it of all the fucktards. No fucker could touch him.
Alas the land was now barren and slowly, very slowly lowlife were slinking in, polluting what couldn't be polluted.
He stepped out and surveyed what was his .....it held no challenges anymore .......the place now bored him ....

He'd made the decision ages ago but now was the time. He walked forward towards the abyss....
New challenges and lands awaited his presence .....
He stepped into the unknown ready to make his mark elsewhere and he was gone ......................
Tell them my story he thought .....

The End
:hang: NIGGER

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